Did you ever encounter a friend, a relative or a colleague, share a few general sentences, agree that you definitely have to meet up one of these days, and then nobody ever initiated it? I am not talking about people whom you don’t have any intention of meeting and with whom you exchange shallow promises as a kind of cultural dance, before you go separate ways. Of course, this can happen, too. But what intrigues me are encounters where people would kind of like to meet up and propose it honestly, just lack the initiative to follow through.
I feel like there is a global lack of energy, that prevents us from connecting even when we would actually enjoy it. Since I am naturally the one with the german-like discipline, always knowing what I said and sticking to it, it took me some time to tune into this kind of empty agreements. But I have to admit that eventually I myself lost the will to be the one organising, so I stopped taking words seriously. What is often left is the pointless verbal dance for the sake of conversation and the possibility that the other person will make the next move.
The empty-agreement-situation is not the only example of what I feel as a sort of a global lethargy. Reading texts in WhatsApp-groups without answering, or letting a new contact with someone we connect well with fall into oblivion because we are busy – all of these things can be interpreted as lack of interest, but I feel there is more to it. (I am deliberately excluding the examples of empty or unhealthy connections, where we make a decision not to be in touch with someone.)
Of course, if someone swipes us off our feet, we will pursue them and not let them go (I hope, at least), but does this mean that we should give up all the promising relationships that can influence our lives in a less dramatic way?
I can’t really put my finger on it. Are we too busy to be present? Too exhausted from all the stimuli in our hectic lives? Unskilled with other people? Disconnected from ourselves or from others?
If you have any thoughts on the topic, please share them in the comment section. I would really appreciate your perspective.